The long dark days of winter are at last receding as the sun
climbs back toward the northern hemisphere.
Like most people, the march into autumn and the journey through winter
is an opportunity to travel within and perhaps discover roads that you might
otherwise miss were it not for the chance to hibernate with the season. For me, I used it as an opportunity to learn
more about myself, to understand better who I am and why I do what I do; a type
of self-inventory. It wasn’t my
intention to cover more ideas or learn new ways of linking and connecting with
spirit and my intuition – I wanted instead to address my “normal” everyday
existence.
However, what I discovered is that we cannot parcel
ourselves out. Let’s face it, we are
holistic beings -- and everything we do is somehow interconnected with
everything else about us. As I worked to
better understand myself, I ended up gaining a greater insight to that side of
me which engages in spirit communication and the nature of myself as a
multidimensional expression. And as
anybody who follows this blog knows, I am always looking to better understand
that process.
When I set out to do this inner work, my goal was to
understand my fears and limitations – why do I have them? What are they? What are the limiting beliefs behind
them? Though my work as a medium
included some of the things I was examining, it wasn’t the full breadth or
reason behind my inquiry. You see, I
view each of us like an iceberg – what we are seeing is really only the tip;
what is below (or inside) may be huge, massive, and incredible, but we cannot
engage it without first understanding the part of us we are already familiar
with, which holds the keys to unlock the doors of the inner sanctum.
The discovery I made was that the doors we keep locked to
this greater self … are doors we built up throughout our lives. In fact, I am starting to believe that when
we were birthed into the world, there were very few (if any) doors we had to
deal with. But as we grew up – through
indoctrinated training in childhood, to peer pressures and societal culturalism
in adolescence and adulthood – we created our own closed doors and a hallway
from which we remain pacing back-and-forth through most of our existence. We see the closed doors we’ve built up and
ASSUME they were put before us by someone else and we are powerless to open
them, or lack the key to unlock what may be hiding behind them. This corridor, this architecture, we allow to
define our strengths and weaknesses, our joys and sorrows.
It takes time and a willingness to face the Gatekeeper.
When I encountered my own “closed door” I asked myself “Why
can I not open this?” The answer
startled me. It wasn’t that a voice came
back and said “You can’t.” Instead, that
voice came back and said “You aren’t worth it.”
In fact, at each closed door I placed myself in front of, I heard the
same rhetoric -- even to the point of this negative voice saying “Even if you
were to open it, someday you will be gone and forgotten. It won’t have made a difference or even
mattered.” To reflect back on this inner
voice is indeed saddening, but it has been – in the end – a gift. Because I knew on some level I created it; I
instilled the demon; and if I created him, I could also excommunicate him and
replace him.
As anyone who has seen a hypnotist or studied hypnotherapy
knows, the mind is malleable and thoughts – if given enough permission by an individual – can be
altered and changed very very quickly, which inevitably creates new ways of thinking
and being. This has been my journey
these last several months. Though I have
not seen a hypnotist, I have been working with similar tools – relaxation to
calm the monkey mind, visualizations, affirmations, in combination with
constant reminders of my own past successes.
Psychologists know that changing a habit takes anywhere from 21 to 30
days of repeating the newfound behavior, as it will also create new neural
pathways.
So where am I going with all of this?
Well, if we are constantly telling ourselves such negative
thoughts about who we are – why we cannot open closed doors – then we must
admit that this same voice is going to sabotage us when it comes to our
ultimate success. This negative voice we
have allowed to DEFINE our SELF-IMAGE.
And one of the greatest lessons I’ve learned in my journey is that the
self-image acts like a thermostat – if things go too well and you have a
negative voice like mine used to be, sabotage is certain to return things to status-quo
normal. In all areas.
Including one’s innate psychic or mediumship abilities.
Think about it. If
you are always second-guessing yourself or knocking yourself down in other
areas of your life, why would it be any different in something you are trying
to excel at? It wouldn’t. The beliefs heralded by the Self-Image would
not allow it, for it would force the Self-Image to be something it really can’t
perceive itself as being … In other words – you cannot become what deep down
you do not believe you can be, because you lack the Self-Image capable of
making it happen.
It is vitally important to examine your inner demons, face them, and understand where you are
limiting yourself. Then understand you
are dealing with habits of thought …
and begin to change them. Start
visualizing, affirming, and believing
you can be the person you wish to be.
Try it for at least 21 to 30 days, taking only 5 to 10 minutes a day to
do the visualizations and affirmations (try it as an experiment). And really put your heart into it. This isn’t about getting material stuff –
like using the law of attraction in order to buy a new car – this is much
greater: it’s about breaking an erroneous Self-Image which will only allow you
to go so far in life, no matter what you do.
Our negative messages we instilled in this exact way: one
day, we started to tell ourselves something bad … then we repeated it … added
some visualization to back it up … and then let it grow naturally into the door
we keep locked before us.
The same thing can happen in reverse.
Now, you might be asking: how does this apply to intuition,
psychic functioning, or mediumship?
Simply put, it’s one thing to believe the ability exists,
it’s another to believe whether it exists or will work FOR YOU, based on your
Self-Image. And then you have to ask if
you believe it can work PROPERLY and CLEARLY for you, as dictated by that same
perception of Self. Do you feel on some
level you are CAPABLE? WORTHY? DESERVING?
Until this last winter, I believed in the ability and that I had it to a certain degree and could help others
with it. However, my Self-Image kept me
from accepting that I was worthy or deserving of it fully. Despite thousands of readings demonstrating a
clarity to link with spirits, it has always been an inner battle if I could do
it each and every time I sat with a client or stood in front of an
audience. Why this inner struggle with myself?
Because a deep inner voice – without my real inspection –
was getting away with the message “You can’t do it. You’re not worthy.”
Since discovering and since ALTERING that, not only has my
Self-Image changed, virtually everything else has, too. My days are bright, I accept “fun” into my
existence (I didn’t even give myself permission to have FUN), and my mediumship
… I now trust.
And that’s what it’s all about. Trust.
The Self-Image determines your magnitude of Trust. When it comes to working with Spirit, the
axiom is to Trust Spirit. However, the
foundation also has to be “Trust Thyself.”
If you cannot trust yourself, you will have an even harder time trusting
spirit … And your development – as well as other parts of your life – will
suffer for it.
It’s only habits of thought … Give it 21 to 30 days, and
habits can change. Along with your life.
