The Mental and Life-Curbing Antagonist

So I'm driving along to work this week when my guides pop in with an amazing message about the struggles of life.  When I unraveled this nugget, a huge revelation was made regarding the role of antagonism in our everyday perceptions.  When you're faced with challenges, how often do you feel like someone is outside of you pushing for your demise, or that there is always someone (or some thing) looking to enact Murphy's Law at your personal expense?  If you often feel that way, hopefully the following inspiration can help shine a light on the way OUT and into a much happier way of being.

____________________________________________________________________________

Here's what my spiritual team "downloaded" into me:

The idea of a constant block of force – a counteractive agent – is purely a psychological condition.  This stems from multiple factors; the two main contributors being a deep mass consciousness belief system adopted by humanity over time, the other being a representation of life through Hollywood and other entertainment providers.  That is, in any drama or story, there is a protagonist and an antagonist.  This supplies the framework which then gets projected onto the face of reality, for which one accepts as the “packaging” of existence. 

It’s a very old story of “hero versus villain,” which contributes to the mass consciousness factor.  In the old times, mankind was always at the mercy of “demons” or “forces of darkness.”  Catholicism played havoc with the notion of an angel on one shoulder, a devil on the other, and it was a constant battle between the two for the sanctity of one’s soul.  Generation after generation.  That’s a lot of belief and energy embedded in the human mass psychological structure.  But it is only a thought, a projection, a hard-core opinion which unfortunately was received as a truth of existence.  It’s not. 

The second component – entertainment – places the same motif within the framework of modernity.  That is, as stated, every hero or protagonist must have his or her opposite in order to make the story or drama exceptional and exciting – to keep the interest of the viewer.  The workings of Drama takes our plights and assigns them to a single person or organization; a simplistic approach taken out of necessity for the sake of time and storytelling.  The more we watch and get wrapped up in such storylines, the more our own subconscious begins to supplant a loving, acceptable reality with what our other senses are telling us from the repetitive viewing of such dramatic structure: reality must actually be this way.  What we forget is that Drama is symbolic and inspired by perceptions and thoughts of outside reality and not the creator of reality itself.  This amnesia is not something we are reminded about, however, as it would really hurt the bottom line of businesses worldwide, who wish to make you think their commercial is what reality would be like if you bought their product!  How easy it is for us to take entertainment’s depiction of reality and accept such a simple philosophy of protagonist/antagonist as being a fact of daily existence: my proactive life versus some force working against me.

The fact of the matter is, life is always growing, expanding, changing, and there has never been (nor will there ever be) an antagonist always looking and hoping to get in the way and foil our deeds.  That’s the truth – the reality which we must come to accept.  The universe and Spirit, from which we are birthed, is One and does not battle against anything.  It lives, loves, grows, and expands.  Anything to the contrary is simply a perception – for life continues regardless of obstacles.  Even “death” does not stop one from living and continuing on – it is simply a path and a journey which moves one into greater avenues of experience (in that case, death is a continuance of life’s AFFIRMATION – ironic, eh?).

When we view our world – in particularly our own goals – how often do we see them as mountains and struggles?  With obstacles we must overcome?  Perhaps we place such challenges in our way not because they are real, but because we believe they MUST be there, in order to match our psychological framework we have accepted: the consistent presence of antagonism.

This is not to say there will never be challenges or that there won’t be times when it appears things are conspiring against you.  However, the phrase “conspiring against you” is a psychological one – a clear sign of the Phantom Menace.  Perhaps – because Life is always expanding, growing, and Becoming more than it was before – such obstacles are not really obstacles, but CLUES that suggest the path to enlightenment, growth, and success, are not what you currently have in mind.  Taken from that vantage point, the obstacles are not obstacles at all; rather, they are the purveyors of success – wayfarers who cry out “don’t tread here – it does not contain the positive outcome you desire.  Our obstructionism is meant to help and guide, not hurt nor hinder.”

The universe is a loving universe.  It is LIFE AFFIRMING and LIFE GIVING.  Is there anything antagonizing or stopping the universe?  No.  Whenever there’s an obstruction – such as a concrete sidewalk atop the petals of a dandelion – the dandelion still finds a way around and out of the cracks, alighting into the brilliance of the sun.  That’s because it doesn’t know of a power trying to stop it; instead, it knows of a power that is helping it, as it directs it to find the crack in the cement and bloom skyward.  The cement itself isn’t challenging the dandelion to a duel, saying “I’m going to keep you under until you die”; no, it is simply saying “The path you seek is not here.  You belong and will grow better and much happier someplace else.” I assure you, the dandelion probably doesn’t take the blockage personally, which is what we are more apt to do when we feel there’s a fight happening with our “villain.”

Part of the antagonist philosophy also makes us believe (on some subconscious level) that whoever is playing the antagonist is laughing and living things up at our expense; that the antagonist delights in a perverse mockery of our struggles.  This contributes to taking losses so personally.  However, this, too, is an illusion, as the universe (for which you are a child of) has no rival.  The idea of a twisted maniac celebrating our demise is again a construction of artists and storytellers – not a truth of the universe; it is simply a philosophy which has grown into a belief system.  In the old days, it would have seemed fitting, as tribes warred against other tribes – life was a series of struggles and clashes between what appeared to be (and oftentimes were) consistent rivals.  But let’s face it – that was on a societal level.

On the base of a single individual and his or her life, there isn’t an archrival or nemesis wholly designed or birthed to counter one’s every move.  There is only the energy and drive of life and the universe – whose sole purpose is to expand and grow.  Whatever obstacles or challenges we encounter, we must do our best to acknowledge NOT as an obstruction laid on the path of our journey by some entity hell-bent on destroying us.  No.  We must examine the challenges and determine – in the light of a loving and expanding universe – if the challenges are meant to steer us in a greater direction, or if we have placed them there as the result of our inner psychological NEED for the appearance of an antagonist.  (If it’s in your belief system, you WILL create it).       

So – what’s stopping or blocking you?  It isn’t anything outside of yourself.  The universe (Spirit) is a loving and empowering force – the expansion of life and progress.  Perhaps your nemesis is only an angle of your own inner perception.  Perhaps obstacles – instead of being taken as the latest attempt by some Phantom Menace to derail your life – could be seen as a loving universe informing you “your best outcome will not be found here.  Don’t dwell on me, just use me as a sign.  I’m not here to destroy you, but rather empower you by showing you this is not the way.”  In that light, perhaps we should THANK our obstacles and move on, versus putting on our boxing gloves or reaching for the latest psychological weapon of self-defense and go to war.  If it’s not the greater universe, then it can only be yourself manifesting your own Phantom Menace. 

It’s only a psychological structure. 

Psychological structures can be changed.

There’s a phrase we use in offering advice to others we see struggling with certain issues: “You need to give yourself PERMISSION.”  That’s another clue of the inner Phantom Menace psychological structure.  How often do we apply that to ourselves?  No such nemesis really exists – it is simply our own thoughts.

When we set a goal, we oftentimes try to imagine what obstacles we must overcome – which in some cases, is automatically INSERTING the Phantom Menace!  Now, there’s nothing wrong with trying to determine where the most work might be needed for success, but more work does not mean “arch rival pounding against me.” How self-critical and judgmental can we be with ourselves, eh? 

When you were born into the world, there was not another being born at the same time whose sole life mission was to challenge and obstruct you at every turn.  So don’t create that psychology for yourself.  Better yet, obliterate such thinking from your consciousness.  Life will feel much more expansive and certainly more inviting.

Communicating with Spirits - It's Natural! Part 1

There is a belief system out there – maybe it’s one you’ve had or you know of someone who has it – that says “if spirits are real, isn’t it unnatural for them to be interacting with us?”  In other words, if there is a spirit realm and an earth realm, doesn’t it stand to reason that because they are separate places of existence that one should not be able to effectively interact with the other?  Almost like some kind of rule that says if you live in environment “A” you should not be able to communicate with environment “B”? 

It’s a belief system that has been passed down to us through the generations.  On one hand, we ask for God or angels or some other heavenly beings to impress the earthly environment to help us out when we pray, but on the other hand, we also hear “talking to spirits is not right.”  In the past (and even today) it is sometimes viewed as witchcraft or leaving one’s self open to communing with Satan if one wishes to “talk to dead people.”  Here, we get the usual sound-bites “You’re not talking to a deceased person – it’s the devil in disguise.”  What I find interesting is that those who usually make that declaration hardly have the qualitative knowledge to know such things, as they lack any experience or breadth of study in spirit communication since their own belief system keeps them totally isolated and sterilized from it. 

Nevertheless, to say that because one is living in environment “A” and should not be allowed to communicate with someone in environment “B” is like saying you can’t have two people in two different rooms of a house talk to each through an open doorway or some other intercom system … or even through the wall itself.  When we really take a closer look at it, living environments are for the expression and expansion of experience, but that doesn’t negate the ability to communicate with others in different rooms.  In fact, as I hope to demonstrate through this first of two posts, it is not only common, it is natural for communication to take place – and quite possibly, was meant to happen.

Let’s face it, when looking through the annals of history -- with stories of divine intervention, ghosts, portents revealed by deceased relatives (and these are by sane, normal, rational people) -- it is clear that spirits interpenetrate the physical realm all the time.  Quite frankly, this functionality has been a part of reality since the beginning and is considered a natural part of existence in many indigenous cultures. 

We must recall that we are spirits having a human experience.  Due to a bit of effort (intention), we have brought our awareness into this physical dimension, yet our home is really the spiritual realm.  We condition our awareness to be present in this earthly domain for the purposes it yields, in terms of growth and expansion.  Yet this does not negate that we still have parts of our soul in connection to our homeland, and are therefore co-existent with that original dimension.  This grants us continued access to it; the functionality needed to engage in cross-dimensional communication.

When we incarnate into the earthly sphere, we have asked several of our friends left in spirit to help us along in our intentions for being here.  These helpers are spirit guides, angels, whatever you would like to call them.  That we have asked them to assist goes to show that they have the ability to interpenetrate into this realm in order to do their requested tasks – otherwise, our requests for their help would be useless.  In “testing” these helpers (as many of us who are on this type of spiritual path have done), they have demonstrated that they 1) Can communicate via the mind with verification occurring in the objective world outside imagination; 2) Can orchestrate physical events that work in sending a message; 3) Can protect us from harm by either mental instruction or actual physical intervention.  This demonstrates the ability that spirit is meant to be able to interpenetrate – it is not “abnormal” or otherwise “illegal.”  Let’s face it, if they weren’t meant to, they wouldn’t be able to, nor would we ask for their assistance to interpenetrate on our behalf.  On some level, we know this interaction is capable of occurring – and that it is all right.    

Now, this interpenetration is not 24/7 for each individual, for we are here in the flesh for a reason and they are simply here to assist – not to live their lives focused in this world, nor doing our personal bidding.  (If they were to be so focused, they would have incarnated themselves and given us a chain to hold them with).  This does not mean they do not spend chunks of time interacting or that they are not meant to have the ability to interact – or that we are not meant to have the same interaction back into their realm with them. 

When you factor in the notion that everyone has at least 1 or 2 spirit helpers (and usually quite a few more), and that when people are aware of them, greater communication commences … this becomes a loud roar that signals spirit having the right and ability to interpenetrate naturally and organically into the environment.  Though I may not be getting messages from my spirit helpers at this very moment (it isn’t necessary), that doesn’t mean spirit isn’t acting on somebody else’s benefit right now.  On a planet with 7 billion people, guaranteed, millions of spirits are right now sending thoughts, messages, and doing work to orchestrate their alliance with people living here.  And these are just the spirit guides!  But imagine that interaction happening right now … All over the planet …

Now, let’s take into account those friends and relatives who have died -- another level of spiritual “populace” in conjunction with guides and angels.  Many people often feel their lost loved ones nearby after they have passed.  Many claim to talk to them in dreams or receive psychic communication from them.  Moreover, in many cases, these deceased loved ones have demonstrated interpenetration by apporting objects and also making complex events happen in the objective “out-there” world to the benefit of people still here.  Now, add that to the work being done by people’s spirit guides and helpers across the planet at this very moment … Millions of people are getting messages from their lost loved ones in so many different ways … Millions are getting inspiration and messages from their spirit guides, too.  Cross-dimensional communication and interpenetration is happening all the time.

Spirit is interacting with us constantly.  Naturally.  It is not paranormal, it is normal.

This is all supposed to be happening.  It is a natural part of existence and reality. 

Part Two: The Greater Picture, The Larger Act of Awareness

Creative Living Isn't Necessarily Logical

Hello again, fellow spiritual travelers! My wife and I just got back from taking a wonderful two week vacation down the Oregon Coast and into the redwoods of Northern California. As is typical when we go on these journeys, we don’t find much time to relax – we fill every waking moment with exploration. It seems our souls are insatiable at consuming what we can about the areas we travel to; what fun sites to see, how do people live in the area, etc. Literally at the crack of dawn we pull ourselves out of bed, grab a bite, and then are out the door. Naturally, this takes a hit on my usual routine of meditating, but that doesn’t mean I completely neglect it!

About a week before leaving for the trip, I asked my guides what they thought about where we were headed. We go to the Oregon Coast annually, so I didn’t expect much of a response. They did give me a prediction for one of the areas we were visiting that was so out of the norm, I was a bit startled when it actually happened. That seems to be my relationship with them: they tell me something, I scoff (“Yeah, right. How’s that going to happen?”), then their prediction comes true and I tell myself “You can’t argue with the guides.” Oh, well, it happens. I’m grateful they still put up with my skepticism after so many years.

One of things they did tell me was that the trip would give me a whole new objective outlook on myself. I did get the opportunity to meditate three times, and indeed received some very poignant (and personal) information that is going to guide me down some paths I haven’t traveled before, but which will nonetheless hopefully lead me to further insights that will enrich and expand my life.

During one of the meditations, information about conscious creation came up. Specifically, the guides wanted to address the use of logic. I’ll preface this by saying they were talking to how I use logic – so this is a personal assessment – and perhaps does not apply to everyone. However, I would like to share what they said. You see, when I plan and hope for the future, I always try to deduce or estimate what “the logical path” is in order to be successful. I’m one of those people that imagines, “If I take ‘A’ and add it to ‘B’, the outcome has to be ‘C’.” Of course, how many times have we thought that and things turned out in no way to be what we had planned!

Well, it appears there may be several reasons why. I could write a whole other blog on those reasons, but that’s not my mission here. Instead, the guides informed me that 1) life is usually not logical, and 2) “logic” may actually be limiting.

Let me explain.

After the meditation, I wrote down everything I could remember. At the end of the session, they gave me an affirmation to focus on, and that was “How can I ‘creatively’ ________?”

“Logic is only two-dimensional,” they told me. “To think logically invites a ‘closed’ pathway, or rather only one path. To ask ‘creatively’ engages all the senses, all the dimensions, and opens creative wells for other opportunities ‘logic’ blocks out.”

“Be happy for disappointments and setbacks, because they hint at and/or sometimes reveal the correct map.” They were showing me a car navigation system here, where you sometimes go off-course, and when you look at the map, there is a sense of relief because it reveals where you are and where you need to be. “When the map is chosen,” they continued, referencing when you can see on the navigation system the correct position and various routes on getting there, “leave the setback and disappointment – the memory of the event and its subsequent emotion – in the past in order to focus or strive toward the new light directed by its opposite.” In this case, they asked “Do you still beat yourself up at having gotten lost once the navigation map shows you where to go? Do you keep your consciousness locked onto the road you are incorrectly on – going in circles – or do you focus where the map shows you to go?” This is what they meant by letting go of the disappointment. Acknowledge it, as you would acknowledge being lost in your car, but once the map comes up that shows the possibilities of getting back on track, move your consciousness there and don’t keep it spinning on the same road of error.

Then they tried to butter me up, but what they said applies to everyone: “You are light and grand, no matter what you do or what time you exist. That light shows all possibilities and engages them. This is the act of your Soul. Thoughts and beliefs inform your relationships.”

“Relationships” was the key here. They explained that, “Happiness is a relationship between your mind and experiences. Everything is experienced inside you – thoughts, emotions, etc. Nothing is outside. It’s your inner relationships of mind (what you think you are worthy and capable of) to that of what you are going through; but how you feel is dictated through these inner channels. You define the relationship – whether consciously or unconsciously, it doesn’t matter. YOU are the one who applies the definition. It’s all inside and a relationship.”

“Instead of asking, ‘How do I logically go from ‘A’ to ‘B’?’ you could ask ‘How do I CREATIVELY go …?’ Logic has very little to play in making things multidimensional.” That was a heavy hitter, and so true when looking at things in retrospect. “Logic can’t predict others’ behavior or thoughts. Logic is a cog-and-wheel ‘cause-and-effect’ linear way of thinking, but cannot rationally predict the behaviors of others – which you need in the march to success – so LOGIC cannot LOGICALLY get you anywhere,” at least when it comes to me, I feel they were saying. “Instead of LOGIC, asking for CREATIVELY walking the path DOES take into account eccentricities, synchronicities, and possibilities of other variables and can include them in the final makeup of success.”

“Creativity goes beyond logic, because it can use the magnificence of ILLOGICAL events to bring about change and new realities.”

“Sadness, disappointments, setbacks, can be used as CREATIVE TOOLS to point to what other things might work and move you in those directions.”

“Logic uses sadness, disappointments, setbacks, as a way of labeling an event and keeping those emotions anchored in consciousness as potential deterrents to future actions.” In other words, if it didn’t logically work out the first time, why bother trying it the same way again?

In terms of how I use logic, they gave me further details.

“Logic is a tool for reverse-engineering events. It is creative in that aspect, and can give you tips and clues on what didn’t work in that particular example and why things might not possibly work the next time. (However, ‘possibly’ does not equate to ‘definitely’.) For instance, one person saying ‘no’ to a request doesn’t mean everyone will say ‘no.’ Someone could still say ‘yes.’ Extreme holders to logic would not be open to the ‘yes’ alternative,” – which I must admit, that’s me, “because they obsess over the ‘no’ reply and label it as ‘logical’ and ASSUME all others would reply in same. This is the bane of creative evolution and event causation.”

“Logic, then, can at times create boundaries when it comes to creating events and changes. To use the expression and feeling of ‘creatively’ approaching a task or goal does not. Logic oftentimes creates limiting ideas via social class (‘because I do not belong to this group, I cannot do …’), education (‘because I did not go to this school or do not have this degree …’), age (‘because I am too old or not old enough …’) and health (‘because I have this condition or symptom …’).

“’Creatively,’ on the other hand, does not allow those boundaries to exist. Creativity, because it can engage so many different levels and possibilities, can bypass those limits – but only in so much as you accept that possibility and leave ‘logic’ out of the equation.”

“Creativity, of course, can induce logic in the causal process, but it will seem like a ‘spontaneous logic’ – as an example: because this is hot, it might burn me. That would logical and correct, therefore, logic does have its place and its benefits. However, logic cannot ALWAYS predict future variables in terms of an outcome. You oftentimes try to use logic to do that, then get frustrated when such ‘personal logic’ fails.”

So one of the things I need to work on is to not limit creative possibilities simply to what I think is the logical route. Instead of asking “How do I logically achieve …” and try to predict the ‘logical’ path, they suggested the better question for me to ask would be “How do I ‘creatively’ (insert goal/task here)” and remain focused on the outcome, then pay attention to thoughts, ideas, and feelings that come up spontaneously which provide a gentle ‘nudge’ forward. Of course, this may not work for everybody, and my guides know how skeptical I am, so things will most likely proceed at a slow pace, but I felt their perception on how I use logic versus creative thinking might be useful to other left-brainers out there like myself.

Life isn’t always logical. As I oftentimes fall back to – quantum mechanics – when scientists first got into that tiny world (and still even today) they couldn’t figure out how it ‘logically’ worked. So why should we be surprised when life’s events oftentimes don’t logically fall into place as WE would like to have imagined them?

Because logic isn’t necessarily wholly CREATIVE. We are multidimensional beings, and we create using multidimensional means. Logic, it seems (at least in terms of how I use logic) is perhaps too limiting when it comes to addressing event creation. Perhaps the limitations of logic also prevent us from experiencing some greater meaning or awareness that could come out of an event, hence the reason why sometimes our events happen in illogical and spontaneous ways – our Souls know better than our left-brain minds. Just a thought.

At least, it sounds logical … heh, heh.

Until next time,

Fear in the Course of Development

Not much more to report on this week in regards to working with the “new sight.” Tuesday was the start of a long week of dealing with a sore throat, congestion, headache … You know what I’m getting at: the blahs. Though it could have been worse. Typically when I get a cold, my muscles really ache and my body feels like it’s been knocked around by a freight train. That didn’t happen this time, and I have faired a heck of a lot better than some of my co-workers who were out for three or four days with this.

At any rate, I’m going to take a cue from my good friend Carol Geiler and talk a little about fear. If you haven’t yet, you need to check out her blog for the week, on the fear of being psychic. I have to say, this is probably one of the best blog articles I’ve read on the subject, and there were so many points that I could relate to from my own journey that I decided to scrap my original entry for this week and write a little about them. So, yes, I’m going to reminisce, and hopefully this bit of indulgence will show something as to the nature of spiritual development, namely that at times it can be incredibly uncertain, scary, and yet also the most expansive force in one’s life.

As Carol mentioned, the two main crux objects that produce fear when it comes to dealing with psychic phenomena is judgment and education. For me, I’d have to say the main culprit falls into the judgment arena. It’s one thing to do psychic readings for friends and people who know you, it’s entirely different when you set out to do it for complete strangers. When I first began, I started with friends from my job (which at the time was in downtown Seattle). Friends are easy, because you know they will forgive you and not hold anything against you if it turns out you are wrong in your reading, or conversely, if you’re absolutely right. Friends like to see friends explore, grow, and become greater. Friendship carries with it the sense of comfort from knowing the person, and hence less stress. The fear comes with the introduction of someone you have never met before, because you have no clue as to their orientation: how do they view psychic phenomena? How do they react normally to the strange and unknown? How closed up are they going to be because 1) they don’t know you, and 2) they may have prejudices and their own fears about things psychic. The first year of doing readings for me was a mixture of friends and strangers. However, the strangers were friends-of-my-friends, so there was some connection within the network. When my company laid off nearly two-thirds of the staff (me included), I had to bite the bullet and actually go do a complete non-connected, no-contact stranger.

That wasn’t easy. It was actually sheer terror. Here, Carol talked about such moments as resulting in either facing your fears directly or shutting them down. By this stage, I had done enough readings to know that I had some ability, but knew that if I didn’t keep moving forward, I would never know just how much more I could learn – and who I might be slated to help with whatever I could do. My sense of needing the education, mixed also with a meaning of purpose, helped me push through my fear. But I have to tell you, it was tough. I was an emotional and physical wreck leading up to the reading.

I had placed a simple flyer on a bulletin board in a supermarket advertising free readings. When I got the call, my heart ended up in my throat. On the day of the reading, my head was spinning with thoughts of “What are you doing? Are you crazy? You could potentially look like a total fool! My god, it will be a miracle if you get anything!” Yes, I seriously was terrified. But I also knew if I didn’t go through with it, I would never be able to look at myself in the mirror again. It was one of those things that, had I abandoned it, I would wander through the rest of my life asking the question “What if?”

It’s the “what if” that has propelled me to push through a lot of my fears. I prepared as best I could for that reading: I meditated, I recounted some of the really good “hits” from previous readings with my friends … I could feel my spirit guides pressing me on. When I got into the car to travel to the client’s location, I played soothing meditation music. When I arrived and stepped onto the pavement of the apartment complex, I don’t think I was any less fearful than what I was that morning when I got of bed. But I had made the trip and was going to move ahead so I would never have to ask “What if?”

And good thing I did, otherwise I know I wouldn’t be here right now. The reading lasted 90 minutes and was filled with some wonderful evidential details. My favorite piece of info was that I saw a Native American in my meditation prior to my arrival, and he handed me a book and said it was for the client. My client was not Native American, nor did she have any Native American paraphernalia on display. During the course of the sitting, the spirit showed up again. When I mentioned it, she laughed and told me she just picked up a book a few months earlier to speak a Native American language.

When the reading came to a close, I was on such a wondrous high. On the drive back home, I couldn’t wait to read another stranger.

Of course, time sets in and the further away you get from a reading, the more you get back into your rut. Though this first real “blind” reading was a major success, I still feared doing the next one. And the next one. And the next one. Even now, after having done this for eleven years, there are times I get frightened before doing readings - worried if things are going to work and if I will be seen as a loony, or worse yet, a fraud.

But one thing the course of my development has taught me: timing is everything. Though you may not necessarily believe in yourself, spirit doesn’t push you into something if they know you are not able to do it. For me, I’m a resistor – I push back when my spirit guides tell me to go do something. Again, fear has a lot to do with it. And when this happens, my guides will keep pushing, knowing that I haven’t given up the course, but am just dealing with fear.

This type of “fear in the face of development” all came up again when I had to do my first group reading, which was simply going to be an experiment. Again, I was terrified, but came through.

I could go on, but suffice it to say, fear for me has been a big issue in my work. And for some of you who know me, you might even say it’s held me back; a lot of people were predicting when I first got started over a decade ago how far out into the mainstream I was going to be, as if to say I was going to be the next celebrity psychic. That hasn’t happened, and I have no idea if it ever will or even if that’s where I want to be. But I still do the work because of what it says about the multidimensional nature of our beings, so that’s the force behind my drive these days.

Carol mentioned you could lose friends and family during this journey. Absolutely, and I’m no exception. I didn’t speak or hear from my family for nearly two years after I divorced my ex-wife – something I absolutely had to do because of the incompatibilities in our relationship, and psychic phenomena, though not all of our issues, was certainly a part of it. That event to this day is still the darkest period of my life. When I walked out the door leaving her behind, I prayed to my spirit guides that “they had better be right about this.” Yes, indeed, during my struggle to decide the course of my future leading up to that fateful day, they told me “You have to leave.” This was the true test of my faith, as I left everything behind. I took very little with me. And had to weather the storm of being called “crazy,” and having lost my mind by my family. I only had one or two close friends around me, and I still had to battle every day inside my consciousness for nearly a year that I was doing the right thing. I left my family, a home, a place that at least provided shelter, but never would have given me room to grow and be who I am meant to be. Now when I look back, had I stayed, I most likely never would have moved forward in reading groups; becoming a member of the Ghost Society; and writing a book and being on the radio? Forget about it. Not only that, there would be another very lonely soul in the world trying to find her way – my wife, Heidi. For those of you who see me and Heidi living such a great life, know that it came on the work of some very hard and fearful events.

When you open up to this kind of work, you really can’t objectively close the door and go the other way. For me, shutting down in my earlier years would have been tantamount to death. At the time in my former marriage I was very overweight and fighting for my own sense of self in the world; to have a purpose and a point for my existence and why the relationship was just never working. And, yes, when you come to the threshold of going out into the unknown, as I have done with attempting my first reading with a stranger, or my first group reading, or the extreme measure of ending a marriage, it is extremely terrifying. But again, timing is everything; spirit doesn’t give you something you aren’t prepared for. (I think this is different in comparison to jumping in with both feet when you are being told, on some level, it’s not the right time. Then the question becomes: how do you know the difference between the two? Well, I suppose that could be the topic of another blog.)

With the release of my book, I’m facing a new set of fears. Now I am being exposed to a wider audience – a whole massive slough of strangers throughout the world, as I call in and talk on various radio shows being broadcast over the airwaves and the internet. Feeling vulnerable? You bet. It’s not for the squeamish. But I’ve gotten this far and survived it all … So at least in this endeavor, I feel I have a very good foundation to jumpstart from. And is typical, when the guides told me it was time to write a book, I resisted. Then accepted. And have moved forward.

Yes, there is a fear with being psychic.

Development and evolution, in some respects, isn’t meant to be easy. It’s the challenges that make us grow and become stronger. And I think it’s something we all share.

The Light in the World

Thank you to everyone who responded on my last post! I received a lot of great responses via email in addition to the comments on the site.

I focused a little more on this strange new sight this week. And though I didn't walk away with any major new epiphanies as to what it means, I did discover that everything "out there" seems to be permeated with light, or rather is radiating such light or is somehow “encased” within light. Now, this may sound simplistic or somewhat "common" in terms of metaphysical jargon, but it doesn’t appear so simplistic when you start to become aware of this all-pervasive field. Now when I look out at the world, I can at first intuit this omnipresent luminescent ocean, and then upon sensing it, begin to “see” a portion of it. I honestly don’t believe I am peering very deeply into it, but am rather striking only an outer “edge” of it. I also noticed I need to be relaxed in order to really perceive even the small amount I am currently able to witness.

When this “auric radiation” first happened to me a week or so ago, I noticed it as being a glow that appeared to emanate from the objects surrounding me. This week, when I decided to experiment with it, I began to notice it was much more than that. I noticed that even the space between objects had light going through it – light of all different colors blended together. For instance, a few days ago I stared at a white wall that was broken up with three or four pictures. It was my hope to glimpse the picture frames glowing a little “hotter” than just what my normal eyes would see. Instead, I noticed that the wall, though painted white, was not reflecting that plain surface back to me. I was seeing hues of reds, yellows, and even faint bursts of purple.

Out of curiosity, I looked all around me and noticed that the space between all the objects hummed with this mixture of colored light. Even now as I write this at my desk at home, I can look all around and see this mixture dancing everywhere. Again, it is so subtle that if you weren’t paying attention, you wouldn’t even notice it. But now that I’ve been witness to it, it’s very easy to see it between things, but not so simple to catch a living object’s aura.

Huh?

You would think that would be easy, right?

Like everything, this is probably going to take some practice. At the suggestion of one of my readers who has learned to see auras, she said to stare into the forehead of a participant, clear the mind, and then notice what pops into the peripheral vision. Though I didn’t have a human participant this week, I did try this with a plant. I must have focused on that thing for about 2 or 3 minutes. I didn’t see any colors, but I could see a rapidly moving energy field around it. To me, it was slightly murky but mostly transparent, and its movement created a kind of air current that was just on this side of being “visible.” The leaves of the plant were a dark hunter’s green, bordering on the edge of blackness, so maybe it was because of the depth of natural darkness on its surface that made it difficult for me to ascertain any other colors? There were a couple of other plants that I glanced at, and one did appear to show me for a brief second a yellow glow mixed with tiny strips of light blue. Of course, then I wonder: Is the plant glowing a yellowish aura hedging on blue? Or is it glowing yellow and the blue that I’m also seeing is but a mixture of the light-field passing between me and the plant? It can all get very confusing …

Our minds are always looking to latch onto objects when we peer out into the world, in order to identify and give us perspective of what is physically before us in our travels. We wish to see what’s physically ahead of us, and so we peer out and say to ourselves “hallway, with bench at the end; a decorative statue standing alongside.” Very rarely do we ever look, acknowledge the physical constructs, and then ask “but what else is between me and these objects ahead?” It is when I ask that question and watch with detachment and relaxation that this colorful field reveals itself. It’s certainly not that this field all of a sudden blurs vision and makes everything disappear; not at all. But my brain suddenly notices, the air between me and the objects isn’t filled with nothingness, it is rather quite the contrary. It is filled with varying fields of light.

I hope you will challenge yourself to see if you can perceive it. It does require some relaxation and sense of detachment. Don’t get too hung up on whether or not you can do it or will see anything. It’s in that “getting hung up” that you will stifle yourself. No, just relax. Then find an object to look at. You don’t even need to stare intently at it, just notice it. Then ask yourself “what’s in the space between me and this object” and just pay attention.

To me, it’s like a fish swimming in the ocean. Because the fish is so used to its environment and seeing from one object to another – such as to another fish or the sea floor – is it even aware of the water surrounding it? Or does it perceive the water as simply “air” as we perceive our own “air”?

We know that the air between objects is teeming with atoms, molecules, etc. etc. So let us not take for granted that there is nothing between you and the objects you perceive.

Of course, someone could make the argument that perhaps all I’m witnessing is something going on within the construct of my own retina – that I’m not witnessing anything “out there” at all, but rather something within the architecture of the rods and cones that allow for the eyes to see in the first place. At this point, I’d have to say that I cannot rule that out. All the more reason to continue and experiment.

The real test will be if I can start to see colors radiating from the objects, as one does with seeing auras, and if someone else sees the same colors I do. At least through the act of collaboration, there’s a little hope that it’s not just the wackiness of my retinas.

Let me know if you see anything!

More Development or Something Else?

Maybe it’s because I’ve been following the events in Japan with passionate interest and my being has been ripe with empathy for the survivors and their woes, or maybe it’s been because so many thousands (if not millions) of others around the planet are being psychically (mentally, soul-fully) mobilized within their own consciousness because of the events overseas and in turbulent Middle Eastern nations … Being “sensitive” and swimming around in all this energy, has maybe affected me in ways I am not familiar with.

All I know is that earlier this week, my sense of “sight” has to some extent changed and I can only think it is a result of deeper sensitivity to the planet and everyone around me.

It was around Wednesday as I was heading back into the office that I suddenly realized I was “seeing” a radiating glow around everything. This aura bursting from the ground, trees, and people was not too incredibly bright or intense, and were it not for the fact that my brain wasn’t preoccupied with some random thought-process, I might have missed it. What was also interesting about the phenomena, these emanations didn’t appear to be light striking my retina, but rather from what I would term my “psychic sense” -- or at least, from the right side of my brain. You know when you wear those funky red/blue 3-D glasses, how the two colors combine in your head to give a somewhat freakish “extra layer” visually to what the outside world looks like? That’s kind of what this was, but oh so subtle. Though I could not detect any colors to the fields, my body was aware that the fields surrounded the objects and I could see them in my mind’s eye superimposed over the images being received by my retinas. At one point, I noted to myself “the dullness of earth suddenly just got brighter.” I was reminded of stories I’ve heard from people who have described the Other Side after a Near Death Experience that everything “glowed with a brightness not seen on earth.”

At this point, it’s certainly not something that has taken over my usual sense of sight. As mentioned earlier, if I had been distracted mentally, I most likely would never have noticed it in the first place. It’s not a distraction, but is definitely a curiosity.

There’s a feeling associated with this newfound view, too. It’s a feeling of commonality, communion, participation. If some of you are wondering whether or not I might be “psychically seeing” radiation infecting the area from Japan’s Fukushima plant, I would have to say “no.” Such radiation was not present in the US earlier this week, nor does the feeling associated with this sight come with a sense of “warning, caution” or other message. My sense of precognition also doesn’t work in the same way this sense of sight appears to. Precognitive events in my experience reveal themselves in quick bursts, like a two second sound bite. This “auric sight,” once I become consciously aware of it, stays with me for the duration of my desire to witness it. Again, since it is so subtle, it is easy to “turn it down” and let it go.

My next step is to test if I can “see” colors coming from the fields. I have a couple friends who can see auras on occasion, so it will be interesting to determine if this is what is happening. If I can “turn the sight down,” is it also possible to “turn it up”?

Or am I simply losing my mind? Hey, we have to leave all options open, right? J

At this point, I have no idea how this has happened. Maybe it’s always been there and I just never noticed? Or maybe it’s because I have been feeling more sensitive in my focus in regards to the planet and all that’s happening? I have a hard time believing it’s occurred simply as a random act; to me, there has to be a trigger.

When it comes to uncovering or dwelling with anything new in the “paranormal” realm, I choose to take it slow and methodical, versus jumping in and getting too dirty (that comes after a certain level of trust). I am going to continue “turning it on, turning it off” and seeing if it just happens to grab me by chance again. When it does happen, though, there is a shift inside my consciousness, not unlike the shift between left-brain and right-brain functioning which I have been getting to know better through various exercises. I’m also curious to see if whether or not it gets “clearer” or more “distinct” in presentation. Like I said, as it stands now, it’s not too intense or vibrant, but it is noticeable. I have recognized it is more “intense” around living things than inanimate objects; though when it first struck me on Wednesday, I could see even cars as appearing brighter than normal.

COULD IT BE RETRO-SUGGESTION?

Wednesday night into early Thursday morning I was struck by a very peculiar dream. In the drama, I was running around a winding parking lot, heading for where I thought was an exit out into the world. When I reached the exit, it had been barricaded. Roaming near the barricades was a wolf. In the dream, I “opened up” and psychically saw a new exit and headed in that direction. When I reached the new opening (which appeared as a one-lane passage), I encountered another wolf; this one a bit larger and scarier than the last. It stepped aside as I approached the new exit. Then it raced towards me as if it were going to bite me. At that point, I woke up. I committed the dream to memory because of its vividness, and for the simple fact that I generally don’t dream about animals, and certainly not wolves.

My meditations this week have been about sending energy to the people of Japan. On Thursday morning after the dream, the course of my meditation morphed into one of my guides informing me that my abilities were going to evolve and heighten a bit more. As is typical with this kind of communication, I acknowledged and honored it, and then did my typical “I’ll believe it when I see it” response, not considering anything about the auric experience from the day before. (I’m surprised my guides haven’t kicked me to the curb for how often I disregard or disbelieve their announcements).

When I came out of the experience, I consulted a couple animal totem books to find the meaning behind “wolf.” Of course there are many traits associated with this powerful animal in terms of group dynamics, but one of the more subjective traits of the wolf totem was its heightened state of senses, many times more than humans. The books declared that these heightened senses from the wolf totem point toward enhanced psychic abilities. An interesting parallel from what my guide told me, I thought. Of course, only time and experience will tell. My guide told me a couple other things, but I’ll keep those to myself to see if they come to pass naturally and organically.

Is it possible the announcement from my guide and the dream of the wolf were powerful enough to begin a new set of circumstances and abilities related to my sight, reaching backward into the past and motivating the optic centers of my brain on Wednesday instead of Thursday? I don’t know, but it’s certainly not out of the question. I was not told exactly what evolution was going to take place with my abilities, only that they would be heightened.

With all that’s going on in the world, I would not be surprised if a good multitude of us gain a heightened sense of awareness and inadvertently develop unforeseen psychic abilities, as it seems we need to continually be on the lookout for social uprisings, political turmoil, devastating earthquakes, and annihilating tsunamis. The closer we inspect these conditions within the context of our consciousness, the more we stretch our senses in an act of self-preservation – of being more aware of our surroundings and attempting with all our senses to glimpse what we can the nature of the future.

In the end, we shall “see” …

Until next time,