Sunday, October 3, 2010

A Perspective on Fear

When it comes to doing things psychic or otherwise considered “paranormal” or “unordinary,” there’s always a possibility of encountering that essence inside that leaves one crying out “Noooo!” A lot of people experience this when they are forced with public speaking (not necessarily paranormal, but outside a perceived comfort zone), or also having to address an emotional issue with a partner, etc. In technical terms, we call it Fear. And as I alluded to in the latter sentence, it is a form of rallying against going outside your comfort zone.

In this case, fear is not something that is necessarily life threatening, but can be life altering. In being a psychic , the fear always stems from whether or not a decent connection can be made; will images and impressions be understood; will I as the psychic be perceived as legitimate, or simply fooling myself (or worse yet, my clients). If carried to the extreme – if the fear were to be real-ized – indeed it could be life altering. I could get shamed, rejected, and not-so-flattering rumors started that could make me a veritable pariah.

In a nutshell, this type of fear is directly related to the Ego. You know, that personal sense of who you think you are. I have met many psychics and healers who are often troubled by this same fear for the reasons outlined above, and many others that (in my opinion) should be concerned about not having such notions.

But then, this does make you wonder about faith. Do you not have faith in your own abilities? Are you selling yourself short?

I have been very cautious and slow to open up about my abilities during my progression. I have been a practicing medium for over a decade, but it has only been in the last 2 or 3 years that I’ve been brave enough to reveal it to a wider audience and try new things in settings that I would typically have NEVER spoke up in (like a courtroom during jury selection, which I did last week).

I have had several people tell me I have a gift, and if they could do what I can, they would be doing a whole lot more and going a whole lot further with it. That’s great praise for which I am so humbly thankful for, but that doesn’t necessarily curb the fear and overcome the boundaries of the personal Ego.

What does all this mean to you as a reader of this blog? I guess it means that, in these types of cases where we are doing something we consider “out of our comfort zone,” the fear is really pointing to our egos. That’s it. And you know what? We are more than just our egos. Much, much more. Our egos oftentimes love to look at what could be the worst-case-scenario (and even bring up past memories to provide a realistic foundation), but never the most positive, which can rob you of that positive potential future. But the only way we can grow and become All That We Can Be is to occasionally move beyond the comfort zone and grasp that which reveals our sacred sense of our larger beings and to GROW.

How do you do that? One way is to give yourself a foundation of positive past results that the ego (or left-brain, if that is where your ego resides) can’t argue with. I have a list of over 60 validated psychic hits that left me going “wow” over the course of my time, and whenever I get really nervous, I just pull that out and review them.

It came in handy when I entered that courtroom. It was jury selection time, with 30 other potential jurors sitting around me, with the superior court judge at his bench and both lawyers (along with the defendant) facing us. The judge asked us collectively “Is there anything about the case that would make any of you think you couldn’t be an impartial juror?” I had to raise my hand. And because the judge was hard of hearing, I had to say it into a microphone that boomed over the courtroom. I explained that I would not make a good juror because I could potentially receive information about the case before I entered the courtroom that could contradict what the lawyers would present (I prefaced it by saying “You’re all going to think I’m crazy, but –“). For me, if another’s person’s fate was in my hands and I received psychic information that produced such a quandary – yeah, I think it could affect me. Was I nervous? You bet. But you know what the judge said? “Thank you for your candor.” Whether or not he believed my abilities, I don’t know. He could have scoffed and tried ridiculing me, along with the lawyers and everybody else in the room – yet none of that happened. (Incidentally, they released me from my duties). If anything, I stayed true to my integrity, and I had a list of over 60 amazing hits that showed I have some kind of ability that could produce data that I couldn’t just ignore or toss out if I felt such information were forthcoming in a trial. I stretched my comfort zone and did myself, plus also a courtroom defendant, some good.

Lately, when it comes to readings, I’ve been twisting my brain a little, too. Again, this is all ego, and there are some creative ways to get around yourself.

One of my greatest joys is to read about all the science surrounding parapsychology, psi research, and consciousness studies. Whenever I get ready to do a reading, these days I admit to myself that I am really in a fantastic position to diving in and potentially discovering something about those fields. In other words, for me to give a reading is an opportunity for me to expand my awareness and consciousness about the functionality and potential purposes and meaning of psi-related phenomenon. Maybe, in some minute way, I can contribute to this information in the world (one of the reasons I started this blog), and so that gives me great impetus to sit longer and “test” the field of energy as I work within it.

I guess in this sense, I don’t consider myself a standard “psychic” providing a service to the public, but rather an explorer in psi-functioning which has an after-effect of helping my clients. And because I’m exploring the phenomenon, I also feel I may gain something more for the client in the process. Such thinking helps to lessen my ego’s fear and the need to retreat. How much further can I go? I don’t know. I totally believe in baby-steps (and there have been a few who would prefer to shove me). Yes, this means I do have an ego - a self-protective mechanism. And that’s okay.

But in order to really grow, you do have to go beyond yourself. And that’s the challenge – and it can come with fantastic rewards, but sometimes you don’t know until you get there.

You don’t have to sell yourself short, just stretch yourself a little bit longer … It can help you, it can help your clients, it can even help strangers – such as a defendant in a courtroom.

Sort of feel like this blog has been a ramble, but there you have it …

Remember, you are a perfect being.

Until next time!


  1. That must have been tough to speak in the courtroom in front of a mixed audience. I am glad the judge acted professionally because if he didn't the lawyers would have followed his opinions like lemmings. There must have been many people questioning your abilities (actually what you can do and see) which makes them wonder about themselves. I also wonder how many people wanted to approach you later to talk, but couldn't because of their egos?

  2. All I know is, the judge at the very least had an interesting story to tell his wife that evening!

  3. Great topic and especially for me right now. Fear has been keeping me from even acting on what I can do (or can't do)! We all need to be more powerful than our fears....congrats to you for being so brave and for inspiring us to do the same..........